Sexual attraction is difficult to build if you started your relationship on a platonic level. Some guys think it’s all about the timing. Maybe you’re always with a group. Maybe you haven’t gotten around to asking her to come over alone.

But stop thinking of excuses why you’re still ‘just friends’ with the girl you want. The fact is, sexual rapport does not exist between the two of you. If it existed, you won’t be worrying about how to build sexual attraction with her right now.

There are some reasons why women would not see you as someone they would sleep with if you’re already their buddy.

They’re used to having you around.

Too much familiarity can kill your chances of being a girl’s lover. She sees you in a different way compared to how she sees the guys she wants to sleep with. The solution? Make the girl miss you. Deliberately go somewhere else when she asks you to go with her to do some random stuff or just hang around. This would make her wonder what you actually do on your own or with other people when you’re not with her.

You seem ok just being their friend.

Women seek male companionship, both platonic and romantic. If they don’t feel a romantic vibe from you, they will assume that you see them in a platonic way. This is perfectly fine with women. If women think you are a great guy but they can’t have you for romantic or sexual reasons, they can still have you around as a friend. The problem with this is that you’re getting frustrated because you’re really not ok being platonic with a particular girl in your group.

What can you do about this problem? Confess your attraction. But do it in a straightforward way so that there is no mistake. Mixed signals confuse women, especially if you’ve been friends for a long time.

They think you’re not attracted to them in a sexual way.

A girl would act affectionate around you because she likes you, but at the back of her mind she thinks you’re never going to make a move on her so she won’t make a more overt move to sleep with you either. The next time a girl asks to cuddle you or becomes overly affectionate, warn her that you’re going to respond like any man would if she keeps going at you in that way because you’ve been attracted to her for a long time. 

Don’t worry about shocked reactions. What’s important is that you let her know that you’re not ‘safe’, you’re attracted to her in a sexual way, and most of all, you have male instincts like any other guy.